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Comments on: Suggestions on How to Have a Happy Marriage https://allenfoxtennis.com/?p=78 Exploring the Strategic Dimension of Tennis Mon, 31 Aug 2020 14:45:44 +0000 hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=4.9.26 By: J Hursh https://allenfoxtennis.com/?p=78#comment-39835 Mon, 17 Mar 2014 21:40:26 +0000 https://www.allenfoxtennis.net/?p=78#comment-39835 Surprising, and very interesting article. Unfortunately I have experienced divorce in life and in doubles. Fortunately I have experienced success in both as well. In college tennis one of the guys on our #1 doubles team was injured early in the season–he was a great player, future grand slam doubles champion, undefeated in singles the previous year in dual matches. His doubles partner asked that he be partnered with me while our top guy was out. I couldn’t believe it, I never even considered myself that good a doubles player, but our doubles partnership turned out to be incredibly successful. He was a better player than I, but I was no slouch, and it seemed every weakness he had was a strength in my game, and vice-versa. I know that sometimes he was frustrated by, for example, my not-so-great serve. But at the same time I know that he was appreciative of the many times I was able to “grease out” service holds after multiple deuces, with his help of course, and I think he came to appreciate that–he understood my weaknesses and my stubbornness. That stretch of tennis was probably my fondest memory in many years of competitive tennis. There are definite parallels in relationships–focusing on and appreciating your partner’s strengths–that focus is a choice we make. Being in the moment, a must in a close match, helps immeasurably in a relationship, as does choosing to be optimistic.

]]> By: admin https://allenfoxtennis.com/?p=78#comment-2648 Wed, 31 Jul 2013 15:50:45 +0000 https://www.allenfoxtennis.net/?p=78#comment-2648 Roger, I put this comment from my old doubles partner, Donald Dell, in the doubles article because it worked for me. I know nothing works for everybody, but I guessed that it would work for most people. Maybe I’m wrong.

]]> By: roger duncan https://allenfoxtennis.com/?p=78#comment-2597 Tue, 30 Jul 2013 19:41:27 +0000 https://www.allenfoxtennis.net/?p=78#comment-2597 Dear Dr Fox,
This is not exactly about your article here on marriage, but related in a way since your article on doubles and blamers in 15-30 has a marriage picture.
I thought that article was great. I sure hope that one of my common partners takes it to hear, but my guess is he is too externally focused to see its merits.
However, I did have one minor quibble. Maybe this will show me to be hyper-sensitive. As a doubles team member, I would get put on edge if my partner said “get me this point. I’ll get you the next” because that implicitly puts significant pressure on me and has an implicit “if you want my support you must do well here” undercurrent.

Best regards, Roger Duncan

]]> By: admin https://allenfoxtennis.com/?p=78#comment-222 Thu, 30 May 2013 22:24:23 +0000 https://www.allenfoxtennis.net/?p=78#comment-222 I remember you well, Packy. You have obviously done very well for yourself in both your business and personal life. You’ve won the game!

]]> By: admin https://allenfoxtennis.com/?p=78#comment-221 Thu, 30 May 2013 22:21:22 +0000 https://www.allenfoxtennis.net/?p=78#comment-221 You sound like a smart and lucky guy!

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